I am an absurd introvert. People close to me are the ones I value and the ones who make me feel like an extrovert when I’m around them. But the society in which I live in continues to pull me stronger into its nauseous gravitational field. People scare me nonetheless; I’m forced to be fake with them and have meaningless conversations with them. I wonder if the purpose of my life is so insignificant that the ones I don’t wanna cross paths with, keep blocking my way purposely and I must let them exploit me because, well, you know, the precious society doesn’t allow my robotic-self to perform otherwise!
Sometimes, I just don’t get it. What am I doing here? Suffering silently and letting people get the best of me has taken me nowhere except inside the gates of anxiety and depression. Whenever I think I’ve gotten closer to HIM, whenever I feel things have started making sense, gravity pulls me again and every other time, deeper into its roots.
Things become vague again – I become fake again – Hopelessness starts finding its way again.
As the sun sets,
My hope does too;
The orange rays left beyond
vanishing within minutes
My soul takes seconds
Shutting down…
Loss of breath…
Until fresh breeze
Cuts through my soul
My hope regains strength,
God sent this air
to awaken me
Once again,
He does this
Again
and
Again…
© Soiba
Photo: mine
May Allah bless you always.
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Jazak-Allah!
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I wish there were words that would take this away. All I know to say is that your words lets me know that I am not the only one who fells/has felt this way. You have coherently organized the thoughts that at times are slamming around in my head. So, again I don’t know what to say other than thank you 🙂
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Your comments are precious dear Margaret. They soothe me and make me feel that there are people like you who are with me no matter what, who are my friends. Thank you for existing. Take care love ❤
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❤️❤️❤️
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A very nice poem, Soiba.
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Thank you.
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Welcome.
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Remember that you aren’t obliged to please others. Learning to say no was the first step to absolute freedom I’ve experienced a couple of years back. Enjoy the beauty of being yourself. And don’t ever allow anyone ever tell you who you are isn’t worthy of love. All the best ❤
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You’re so right dear friend. Learning to so no is something I really need to incorporate into my life. Thank you for your comment. Stay blessed and happy ❤
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Soiba, I feel your words! I have been there and all I can tell you is, it gets worse before it gets better. Stay strong, my friend!
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Thank you for the motivation Nathi 🙂
Stay happy!
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Anytime! Take care 🙂
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Again, and again, and again. So relatable, Soiba. Lots of love to you. ❤
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Thank you Mags ❤
Hope you’ve been doing well and keeping safe xx
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You’re welcome, Soiba.
I’m doing well, thanks.
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Nice poem ❣️❣️
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God bless you Soiba! May you be encouraged.
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Aameen. Blessings to you and your family 🙂
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Thank you! ☺🌏
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Great poem
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Thanks 🙂
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I felt being in flow with your thoughts
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Thank you 🙏
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